Practical Advice to Handle Angry guys – that includes
you!
Nowadays I find many senior
citizens becoming target of anger at the hands of youngsters. Seniors are targeted
because they are vulnerable, cannot (more often, do not want to) fight back
because of peculiar circumstances they are in. As they are likely to be mature
through experience spanning six or more decades, handling other peoples’ anger
should not be difficult.
Why do people get angry? It
is because of disappointment over expected things not happening or unexpected
things happening. Therefore the root cause is expectation as to how things
ought to be. Can we learn to accept things / events as they happen without our
seeing them through colored glasses? That is, without any sort of emotional
involvement? Let us see.
What to do if someone is angry
at you? If you are sane and calm, keep quiet and just listen. Later, try to get
at the root of the problem. Most often anger is only the external symptom.
Causes could be hidden and not apparent. If you are equally in non-receptive
mood, just move away. Don’t try to reason out or justify. This only aggravates
the issue.
What to do when you are
visibly angry? If the person on whom you are angry is someone who would stomach
it, vent off your anger and apologize when you cool down. This could be a
subordinate, wife or a friend who understands the situation, cooperates by keeping
quiet and not adding fuel to the fire. Displaying anger when it comes and
cooling off, compromising are better than bottling up anger that leads to
stress and increase of Blood Pressure.
If the person upon whom you
are angry is someone to whom you cannot afford to display your anger
(consequences would be highly unpleasant), then try to control your anger by
moving away from the scene; force yourself to sit and take a couple of deep
breaths
Getting angry could be a routine
pattern of reaction to many. It could be defense mechanism. The trigger could
be trivial and a matter of no concern at all, most of the times. Hard core
angry men who would not ever realise the futility of getting angry, or those
who don’t realize the harm they causing to others need counseling and help.
Provide these if feasible. If this is not possible, cut off your relationship
and don’t see him again.
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